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The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the porn ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word bokeh for porn caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, porn she rolled her eyes and porn declared bokep the woman memek an ‘actrice’, crot or porn bokeh sex worker.

Now, porn according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokeh it all bokeh makes memek scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and crot all memek men dread – the louder bokep the cry of ecstasy, bokeh the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, crot you porn can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: memek there’s bokep sex as performance art, porn and crot sex as genuine intimacy. And crot when a woman is genuinely bokeh aroused, porn trusts her partner and crot crot is not fearing for bokeh a fragile male ego, bokeh she’s far more likely to gently sigh and bokep moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my memek Parisian hotel.

In my days memek editing The Erotic Review magazine, crot porn female contributors regularly confessed to faking porn orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, crot they’d explain, bokeh so they could make their partner feel happy, memek while conserving bokeh their energy bokep for porn crot other tasks in hand. This memek was the conclusion of another study by two bokep researchers from memek the University of bokeh Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and bokeh ‘manipulation’, bokep and crot that women were prone to bokeh what they crot described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, bokeh so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of bokep ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: porn ‘I’m enjoying this, bokep but can memek you get a crot bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, crot ladies?

The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education bokeh comes from porn, memek where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland porn said in 2014 after neighbours complained porn bokep that her sexual yowling drowned out porn their TVs: memek ‘As bokep far as I’m concerned, porn that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, porn only if you want to attract memek a certain kind of attention.

In bokeh their book, porn Sex At Dawn, bokep Christopher Ryan and crot Cacilda Jetha concluded the most crot likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on memek observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby bokep males that they memek were fertile and porn keen to bokep copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, bokep I can understand bokep the need to advertise. But if you’re not, bokep then men should take heed: bokeh the best sex may just crot be the quietest.

Paris

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