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The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long memek been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s bokep Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should crot offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for porn caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, bokep she rolled her eyes and memek declared the woman an ‘actrice’, crot or memek sex worker.

Now, bokep according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, memek it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and crot all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, porn the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, bokep you can’t crot measure passion in terms of porn decibels: porn there’s sex as performance art, bokeh and memek sex as genuine intimacy. And bokep when a woman porn is crot genuinely aroused, crot trusts her partner and memek is not fearing for porn a fragile male ego, memek memek she’s far more likely to gently sigh and porn moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian bokeh hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, bokep female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an bokep occasional basis, bokep they’d explain, bokep so they could make bokeh their partner feel happy, porn while bokep conserving their bokeh energy for porn other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were porn all about manners porn and bokep ‘manipulation’, bokeh and memek that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in bokep crot order to encourage their porn partners over the finishing line, bokep so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like memek saying: bokep ‘I’m enjoying this, memek but can you get a crot bloomin’ move on.’ Sound memek familiar, memek ladies?

The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, bokep where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland crot said in 2014 after neighbours bokeh complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: crot ‘As far as I’m concerned, memek that’s what you memek should be doing.’

Well, bokep porn bokeh only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, crot Sex At Dawn, porn Christopher Ryan and crot Cacilda Jetha memek concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – memek was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and porn keen to copulate.

If porn you’re a sex worker, bokep I can understand memek the need to advertise. But if crot you’re not, porn bokeh then men bokep should take heed: porn the porn best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris

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